Monday, November 03, 2008

Complete and utter stupid behaviour

There's something completely and utterly messed up about getting to midnight and, having just finished one review for the FPI blog, deciding to spend another hour on the next one instead of heading for bed as it's back to work in the morning.

But there's something really, really fucked up beyond belief when, at 1am, having finished the second review I decide to get the school stuff together, sort out the file, load up the usb sticks and start bloody work on a lesson plan.

Therapy would have a field day with me. The depressed mood hasn't really lifted. Spent the entire day just black as black can be. Nothing brought me to life, nothing made me snap out of it. And that lasted till about 8 this evening. Molly and Louise had kept away. Molly kept sneaking me little notes and work she'd done on this big DFC review / art thing we're trying to do. Very sweet. She knows something's wrong with me but has learnt that I snap out of it eventually. That will probably resurface later on when she's a teenager.

This evening I just started to cheer up a little. Not much mind, just enough to start thinking properly about it. Still stressed about the roof, still worried that we're never going to get it sorted, but steeled towards talking to the builders about it in the morning.

Right, back to lesson pland. 1:30? Early yet!

1 comment:

  1. I've certainly been there. My commiserations.