Monday, March 03, 2008

It's back: return of Black Dog, Mother's Day weekend and more problems.....

Well that good mood didn't last that long did it?

Still up from getting the Carter tickets, we entered Mother's Day weekend with a trip into York (new Brownie uniform for Molly) and a nice mooch round the shops.
Next up it was a contrived set up by Molly suggesting Louise has a quick nap because she had a bit of a tummy ache earlier. Louise had obviously been preped ahead of this and agreed readily, knowing that we needed her out of the way for a bit of kitchen time.
We made Mother's Day cookies. Which are just normal cookies with a bit of icing on top. But lovingly made.

Then off to Pocklington's Chinese restaurant, recently reopened after the June floods. And a great meal it was, made all the better as it was a complete surprise to Louise. Amazingly, Molly had managed to keep it totally secret, almost unheard of for her. Normally she'd spend all week asking Louise if she thought it was time to visit the Chinese again, or what sort of food she'd want if we went out for a meal on the weekend. But not this time.

So far, so good. But at some point on Saturday I went out into the back garden and noticed the downpipe from the shower outlet was leaking. Again. This happened a while back and was fixed then. Unfortunately it's started again. The main problem is that if it's anything more than a leaking valve just where the pipe leaves the wall, it becomes a huge job. Because the builders, bless them, decided to put the shower drain pipe under the floor. So if there's something wrong with the pipe further in, it's time to rip the bathroom out to find the problem.

Of course, Louise, as usual, is the voice of reason in all this. We've got the plumbers coming in on Monday, there's no evidence at all that it's anything more than a leaky seal and it just needs fixing. No problem, no property damage and no need at all to worry.

But that's just not my way is it?
To be honest it's difficult, not to mention rather embaressing, to try to describe how ridiculous the thoughts and feelings I have in times like these. The truth is that I'm fully aware of how stupid I'm being. I know how silly it is to get so affected by something that is, in most likelihood, just a minor problem.

But as soon as something like this happens, my mind seems to plunge back into all too familiar patterns. I tense up, stress overwhelms me and I feel desperately overwhelmed with despair and frustration, incapable of using logical, reasoned thought and just retreat into depression.

So that was Saturday. Sunday was spent in a down mood. Not particularly bad, just that horrible grey mood that washes everything out. Despite that, Mothering Sunday was a great day.

And then today.
Work was okay. We had the people coming to look at the downpipe this afternoon and Louise was home to report that they did a good job and they seemed confident that it was all fixed now.

But it's never that easy. We just went out and there's a tiny drip of water coming out from where they've just sealed it.

That simple little, insignificant little bit of water has just sent me all the way back down again. I'm now convinced it's something more serious, convinced there's a problem that will involve ripping away floors, ceilings and bathrooms, convinced everything is wrong. Life just feels a bit shit tonight.

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