Thursday, March 20, 2008

Teaching adverts.

Have you seen the latest ridiculous ad for teaching?
The one where the oh so cool young teacher, fresh out of teacher training, looking all of 17, sits at the front of his class just before he starts talking about the gig he saw last night and how he thinks the kooks are just the best band he's seen for a long time.

The class meanders in and one of the lads makes a 3-1 sign about the football last night. Child-teacher sets them all to task with a careful and relaxed hand gesture.

What a crock of shit.

Alternatively the class marauds into the room, screaming abuse at the poor wet behind the ears kiddie teacher. If he can make himself heard over the din, his pitiful attempts to connect with the kids and show them how he's one of them meet with nothing but scorn and derision. He retreats to shouting ineffectually at the class and trying to get them to do anything at all to justify his salary, which, seeing as he's spending all night, every night marking, planning and worrying about the next day's nightmare, just doesn't seem all that good anymore. Plus he's developing a worrying acid reflux condition that the doctor says may be a stress related ulcer and his last girlfriend left him when he started becoming too tired to make the latest Kooks gig and would rather spend his time crying pitifully into the sofa.

Which of these sounds more likely?
I worked at Smith's Wood School in Birmingham for 5 years. I know which one is true.

1 comment:

  1. Yep, I went to an exceptionally good school, one of the best in Scotland in fact, and even there it wasn't like that! And none of my family members who are teachers tell it like this either, oddly enough... It also infers how enthusiastic all new teachers are - I'm sure many are, but I also know plenty who have ended up doing teacher training because they have a decent degree and never found a job that pays well so thought, sod it... Made me laugh when Armstrong & Miller took that tack in their last season on the Beeb because I've know a few folks who did exactly that... Sometimes when I look at the starting salary I'm almost tempted myself - and now they are demanding a 10% increase? Or else we go on strike... Nice - most of us will never see these salaries, 10% increases or even be secure enough to go on strike to try and get them...

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